Mask Or Menace - IC Contact Post

[helpdesk_hero]

This is David Alleyne, I'm not available at the moment.
Please leave your name, contact information, and what this is regarding after the beep.

Comments

[goldtoxicity]

cool see you soon

[ god he hates everything right now. ]

[helpdesk_hero]

No input I should add into the first phase search?
Like ‘must have a good view of the apocalypse? But not the one that is an Egyptian dude with massive lips’?

[goldtoxicity]

i dunno
big living room? guest room just in case we need to take someone else in?

[helpdesk_hero]

Three bed. Two bath. Large bathroom and kitchen. Centrally located.
Got some good looking apartments already.

[He doesn’t get that they really are looking for a house.]

[goldtoxicity]

i mean apartments are nice but thats not what were looking for dude

[helpdesk_hero]

You... do know houses are hard to get, right?
But I’ll try. Maybe see if there is a pool too.

[goldtoxicity]

i looked into it im fine
also
i mean my hospital got eaten by zombies but like
you do know they were paying me to be there right

[helpdesk_hero]

Good point. Damn. It’s like I have two sugar daddies.

[goldtoxicity]

now IM the responsible one

[helpdesk_hero]

You might be. I’m the one that ran away with their not-boyfriend for a while.
Though in my defense I have maintained my freelance work with the various teams.
And picked up a new power.

[goldtoxicity]

im glad you werent here it was awful and i wouldnt wish it on anyone man
and you did???

[helpdesk_hero]

Psychometry. Because why should I get to touch things.

[goldtoxicity]

[ he should say something serious, because this is serious and the apocalypse is happening and everything sucks

but. ]

oh my god you could be a real tv psychic

Autocorrect turned items into Ireland originally.

[helpdesk_hero]

[FUCK serious.]

Antique dealer is what the Psy teaching me advises. Could make money verifying providence of items.

oh my god

[goldtoxicity]

please
please do
for me david you gotta do this for me get a camera man and go on the road itll be like antique roadshow but people will actually watch it

Re: oh my god

[helpdesk_hero]

First Bart wants to turn me into a streaming gaming personality and online chef and now you want me to make antiques road show?
What even is my life?

[goldtoxicity]

yes
why do you not understand that people want you on tv

[helpdesk_hero]

Because no one wants to see me on TV, Josh.

[goldtoxicity]

i want to see you on tv and im the only one who matters

[helpdesk_hero]

Why would you want to see me on TV? I don’t even have a personality good for TV. People wouldn’t want to look at me on their screens.

[goldtoxicity]

1. yes they would youre attractive and this is coming from a literal biological expert
2. dude youd look directly into the camera any time someone said or did something stupid and thats the quality content we need

[helpdesk_hero]

You want me on TV for the sole purpose of the ‘Office Camera Look’ value? Wtf man?

[goldtoxicity]

youre also smart and know things and explain them well

[helpdesk_hero]

I don’t know antiques. Not really.

[goldtoxicity]

buuuuuuut
you could read objects and talk about their history